Getting healthy has been a struggle for me for such a long time. With all the health issues I have from top to bottom, one would think it would behoove me to make better decisions. I have a neurological condition that I had brain surgery for, heart issues, various gynecological issues, to include needing surgery for one of them, infertility issues, abnormal bleeding that has prompted multiple procedures, pre-cancerous in a few areas, pre-diabetic/gestational diabetes, seasonal asthma, and just recently, I discovered I have a malformation in my back and osteoarthritis. That's only the physical stuff. I honestly would not be surprised if I forgot something in that list because I have almost gotten desensitized when it comes to my health. I share this list with you not to gain pity or attention, but to give you a better picture of how much I really struggled with taking the steps to living a better way, despite knowing what was at stake.
As I reflected on why, I realized, that I was believing a lot of small and big lies. Some of these lies were half-truths, and some were flat out wrong. Nonetheless, they were all keeping me from a happier and healthier lifestyle. They are in no particular order, and I have to preface again that these were lies and truths that I felt applied to me and ones that I personally needed to realize and learn. Yours may look a little different. Here we go!
Lie #1: I don't have time.
Truth: Everyone has the same 24 hours. Some of the most successful, wealthiest, busiest and inspirational people in the world, ALL have the same 24 hours. These same people work crazy hours, make impacts, have families, etc. but still make the time to be healthy because they know and understand the value and importance of investing in themselves. This was hard for me, because my to-do lists are often never ending, work projects keep popping up, and mommy and wife duties keep going, that sometimes it's hard to catch a break just for myself. The last thing I wanted to do was work out. But, I swallowed the hard truth that we MAKE time for the things we want to prioritize.
Lie #2: I'm so tired.
Truth: You are tired from all the things you are doing; swap one of those things for your heart and body. I was really tired, and chronic fatigue is a symptom of one of my conditions. But the reality was, that I could re-evaluate and re-prioritize my schedule to fit exercise in. The other truth to this is that we may be too tired to work out or prepare healthier stuff in the kitchen in the beginning, but in the long run, we will get more energy from doing so consistently.
Lie #3: I need my sleep.
Truth: We do need our sleep, but I was using this as an excuse to NOT work out. I could have spared 30 minutes of watching tv, resting, procrastinating, social media time, or another thing elsewhere to prioritize my health, so that I could have better energy and health to do all the things I do need to do. Have you ever seen the rocks demonstration?! If I was honest with myself, I could work out AND sleep.
Lie #4: I can't because of health.
Truth: Exercising was causing pain and flare ups, but I was either discouraged or using it as an excuse to not do what I was allowed and capable of doing. This lie I was scared of for so long. After my brain surgery, I struggled with many exercises. I could only do low impact things like walking, swimming and the elliptical, but even then I had to stop after 7 minutes on the elliptical while other people next to me were 20 minutes and going strong! Regardless of what exercises I tried, if pain ever flared up, I would be afraid that my conditions would get worse, potentially leading to more surgeries. That fear paralyzed me from making healthier decisions that could decrease my pain flare ups in the long run. Even if I struggled with getting to a swimming pool, or financially couldn't get a gym membership to use an elliptical, walking was the easiest and most accessible thing to do. Although that was the case, I could never be consistent with it. I would start, then stop. I just was not motivated to do it, which leads to the next lie.
Lie #5: I need to be motivated to do it.
Truth: Motivation helps, but it is not needed. Does it help to be motivated to workout, make a hard relationship work, go to a tough job, etc.? Of course it helps. But if we viewed situations with a sense of urgency or changed the purpose of our actions, we could do so much more without that kind of motivation. If you needed to raise money for your sick child and were given the option to work overtime, would you care if you liked your job or not? If you knew that your health issues would take away your ability to do many things with your children, but were given the chance to change that, would you take it? I needed to be motivated by a desire, urgency and value of my future (1 Corinthians 6:19; Matthew 6:33)...not by some warm, fuzzy feelings.
Lie #6: It's not really going to help.
Truth: Every bit helps. I told myself that walking 10 minutes is so little; it was barely going to make a dent. Whether some believe that to be true or not, 10 minutes of walking is still 10 more minutes that I was not doing anything physical for myself. Then eventually, that 10 minutes will turn into 15, then to 20.... You get the picture. Whether you take baby steps or giant leaps, you are still moving forward in a direction toward a healthier life.
Lie #7: I tried before and nothing happened.
Truth: It takes time to see results. I know there are some people who can shed the weight and inches so easily. (Grrr, I mean, grrreat for those people!) But let's face it. Many of us fall into the category of the fact that it takes time, especially as we get older. Yipee! Many of us will not shed a large amount of weight in just days or a few weeks that took months or years to gain. I am not saying that it is not possible, because there are so many programs out there. All I am saying, is that I would start a physical plan, then be disappointed after a week or two of barely seeing any progress. It made me feel like my efforts were for nothing, and that I could use my time doing something else. I needed to be patient and trust the process.
Lie #8: It's not fair.
Truth: Life is not fair and everyone has a different story and purpose in their lives. I would feel discouraged, frustrated or depressed even, when I would see how others, who live such unhealthy lifestyles, not having long lists of health issues, could get pregnant easily (or so it seemed), or did not gain a lot of weight. Playing the comparison game was not healthy or constructive for anyone, including myself. The truth is that we all have our own paths and that we only have control over the decisions we make.
Lie #9: My past will come back.
Truth: My past is behind me. This was a really hard one for me that I did not realize affected me so gravely. It was so paralyzing, where I could be staring at the elliptical and tell myself, "Okay, just do 5 minutes today, or even 1 minute," and then not be able to. I was afraid that the horrible things that happened to me and/or the horrible decisions I made when I was thinner, would return when I inevitably lost the weight from being healthier. I will save the details for another time, but let's just say it is a long history of pain that I am still healing from. In believing this lie, I was admitting that I would rather stay unhealthy, and have potentially life threatening diseases and conditions, than to have history repeat itself. In believing this lie, I was admitting that I didn't believe God was/is in control or that He was powerful enough. But the truth is, He is! I did not realize that I was doubting and in denial right away. Of course I believed that God is sovereign, and of course I believed that God is powerful. But when I was able to sit back, reflect, and admit that these were my thoughts and feelings, I was able to see I was believing it in only certain areas of my life. I needed to overflow those beliefs to this. And when I did, it set me free. (John 8:36)
Those were the lies! There may be more, but those were the frequent ones. I still struggle with all of them from time to time, but it is way better than what it was. These past few years have been a roller coaster with my health, but God is faithful and never gave up on me! With some baby steps, giant leaps, and most importantly, some deep, honest reflection times, God opened my eyes and my heart to trust Him in this area of my life. He reminded me of one of my favorite verses, 2 Corinthians 5:17, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come." I knew that I could take on the challenge and the fears because He was with me, and He is greater than anything in this world. I went from walking and low impact exercises, to doing some awesome 30 minute, sore-muscle-inducing workouts! My health has been the best it has ever been. I have had less pain flare ups, some issues resolved, and I met my end of the year goal even before the year ended! I am so excited for what 2016 has in store. I hope and pray God will continue to strengthen me, guide me and keep me focused on those big rocks to keep moving forward with my health journey!
What lies do you struggle with when it comes to getting healthier? Some of my same ones? New ones?
Let's combat these lies together and be the healthiest we have ever been in 2016!
Lots of Love,
Phoebe Grace
**Please be sure to consult with your doctor before starting any health plan**